“Just us”

Dear Blake,

In a few months you will be a big brother and I’m really thinking about how this will be changing things in our family.  Your Dadda and I are very excited to have another boy coming soon to our family!  When you were not born yet I thought about the same things…how will this change things?  Will things be different?  Will things ever be the same?  I found out things were never going to be the same again, but in a good way!  I was so scared when we finally went to the hospital and I thought, this is it.  This is the last time your Dadda and I will be “just us.”  But then you came along…and oh my things were different.  Now we can’t imagine our lives without you.  I even have a hard time thinking back to how things were with “just us.”  For so long now you have been in our family and this is the new “us.”

I’m starting to think about what life will be like with another boy being added to our family.  How will this change things?  Will things be different?  Will things ever be the same?  I imagine the answers are the same as when you came along.  But I find myself being scared again.  Will you be jealous’?  Will you think we forgot about you and only love the new baby?  Will you feel left out?  Things will never be “just us” anymore.  I’m tearing up just writing this because I value our special times together.  Like when I give you a bath, and when I read you stories at night, and when I rock you to bed.  Those times will no longer be “just us.”  There will be a new baby there at bath time and story time and going to bed.

I know that when I look back at this I will think this is silly and I can’t imagine my life without you both in it just like I do with you.  But for now, this is all I know and this is all you know.

We will still have special times together “just us” still, I promise you that.  We will make time for special moments together.  But we will also make new moments and memories with our new family, and we will not be able to imagine a time without him.

Love,

Mama

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4 thoughts on ““Just us”

  1. I thought those same exact thoughts when I was pregnant and the dog was no longer going to be my little one! I’ll think those thoughts when I am going have a second child as well!

  2. I don’t know you were expecting! Congrats! I wondered all those things with my husband and myself and I know I will again when Noelle has a brother or sister. But us women are magic and always seem to figure out how to balance things

  3. Oh, Erin, I felt this exact same way. I couldn’t imagine a life where Maddie wasn’t the very center of it. Turns out, there is more than enough room in the center for Katie. I know exactly how you feel, and I’m so glad you wrote this. You will look back on this someday, I think, and smile.

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