Recovered…or not

Dear Blake,

I thought the scariest day of my life was the day you were born because it was a scary new thing in my life until…about 7 days after you were born.  That was the scariest day of my life.  It was about 3 in the morning when you woke up and I fed you.  I put you to bed and noticed something was not right but I went back to bed.  I woke up around 5 am with this feeling that something was wrong with me and I ran to the bathroom.  There was something wrong with me that I don’t want to go into detail but it was so bad that I screamed for your Daddy.  I think I probably woke you up too. The next thing I knew your Dad was there at the bathroom door asking what was wrong.  You woke up shortly after that and Daddy had to go get you and hold you and you were crying while I was screaming in the bathroom that something was wrong.

I told Daddy that he should call an ambulance.  I had never gone in an ambulance before.  My Dad was a firefighter and a paramedic and the only time I had been in one was when we got to visit him in the firehouse and got to go in the different trucks and ambulances.  I was so scared that I would pass out or something worse would happen to me because I was losing so much blood so I made your Father call 911. 

The next thing I knew the paramedics were in our house and upstairs and walking into the bathroom (talk about embarrassing!)  But it was an emergency situation that I didn’t even care!  They took me out of the house on a stretcher as your Dad was holding you and calling someone on the phone to come babysit you while he went to the hospital with me.

I went into the ambulance by myself and all I kept thinking about was you and your Daddy and how I just wanted everything to be ok so I can be with you both.

Love,

Mom

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